our loss, her gain

I'm writing this entry, with yet another very heavy heart. Yesterday we found out that one of my best buddies here on earth passed away and went home to be with Jesus.....my Grammy June. We always said we'd be happy for her when she would get to pass from this often pain stricken and dark world, to a place where there is no pain, tears, and sadness and where she'd get to reside with her Savior. Yet, we find ourselves still sad, mostly because she had such a huge impact on all of us, and we are going to miss her like crazy. My Grandma had a tough life, but she was resilient, hard working, always looking to the positive, and leaning on our Lord for her source of strength. The lessons we all learned from her are immeasurable. Mostly, they were about how to give and love with all that we have.

My heart is aching right now, my eyes are swollen, and I feel a piece is missing from my insides, but I know my Grammy wouldn't want me to be sick with sorrow. She's in the best place ever, with our precious Redeemer, and she's being reunited with her sister Bonnie, Aunt Peggy, and her sweet baby boy that she lost at such a young age, amongst many other dear loved ones. She might even be down on her knees digging in the dirt of God's garden, or baking sweet treats without any pain and trouble now. We couldn't be happier for her, we will just miss her SO much here on this earth. She was so loved, and I am honored that I was loved by her.

Here are some of my sweetest memories of my Grammy.

• She would often tell me how she rejoiced when I was born (I was expected to have severe problems) and I came out as healthy as could be. She cried for joy that day.
  
• Going to her house as a child to play or even spend the night. She always had such a cozy, well taken care of home, and was such a hostess.....making our favorite foods, and giving us "bunny" milk (Nestle strawberry milk). Being with her made me feel warm and loved.
• Organizing my mom's linen closet together to surprise Mom. I loved learning from her.
  
• Watching Sound of Music, or the Miss America pageant, or ice skating on TV together when I was young.
  
• Playing cards with her....she LOVED to play because she enjoyed the interaction between people during a game. We played Progressive Rummy, and Hand and Foot until our fingers hurt.
  
• Her thoughtful cards for birthdays and holidays. She always took time to write the kindest notes that expressed how she truly felt about a person. I've saved many of them knowing they were special.
  
• Learning how to make her recipes, from Christmas Cookies, to Chicken Spaghetti to pie crusts, sometimes even over the phone from her. She would giggle at my mishaps, and so would I. She had everything down to a t with her recipes. Mine often turned out tasting okay, but weren't near as pretty as hers. I will save her handwritten recipes forever.
  
• Getting special deliveries of her honey mustard dressing each time we visited, or when my parents were heading up this way. We took it out for dinner last night and cried in remembrance of Grammy.
• Receiving her labors of love.....Grammy afghans from her. Every family member has one and we snuggle up in them daily.
• Making her photo calendars of the whole family, sending her great grandchildren artwork and photos in the mail, and the digital photo frame for this past Christmas. When she'd open her gifts, she did it so slowly that everyone would say, "Hurry up Mom, or get a move on Grandma", and then she'd cry tears of joy when she finally revealed her gift. She had such a gracious heart.
  
• Talking to her to announce each pregnancy and delivery of my three children and having her be over the moon about each one. She LOVED babies. Introducing her to each one was even more special. I'm so thankful my third was a girl, and I could name her Luciana JUNE in honor of Grammy June.
  
• Over the past several years, I have called Grammy every Friday to talk with her. She called me "Old Faithful," and always acted so blessed by my calls. I know she felt at times like maybe I felt obligated to call her, but I didn't, it was my pleasure to speak with her each week, to share my life, to gain wisdom from her, and let my children speak to her and know a truly precious angel. I'm going to miss talking to my "Old Faithful" every Friday too.
  

I can honestly say, Grammy was one of my dearest friends, and I was blessed to have her in my life. Words can't describe how much I'm going to miss her. As she would often write in our cards, I love you "mieces to pieces, oodles and oodles, and oh so much" Grandma. I only hope I can pass on all that you've taught to me to my children, so that your legacy of love continues to live on.